During my childhood and adolescence in the 60s and 70s, it was difficult to come to terms with your homosexuality, especially in the countryside. I have always been attracted to my friends and sometimes to their brothers or their father. At the very beginning I did not understand my attractions because they were attracted to girls, and I pretended to be too. With my best friend, we talked about our desires, he told me about the girls who made him want, and I gave the change by inventing desires ... We went on vacation several times together, sleeping in the same tent or in the same room, sometimes in the same bed, but nothing ever happened. We took showers in sports, we got naked in front of each other when going to bed and putting on pajamas or a T-shirt. I didn't want to tell him about my desires, but my shyness and fear of his reaction made me want to confide. So I was content with masturbation in the shower or in the toilet.Years passed, he got married, had two children. The work meant that without losing sight of each other, we met less often. But our friendship never deteriorated, and we were always very happy to meet.I remained single, and my sex life was initially made up of stealthy encounters in places not always very shiny. In addition, I received dozens of men at home, married, single, some gay, others bi, others who pretended to be straight, but came to take pleasures that Madame supposedly refused to give them. In short, the life of the gay who is hiding on a daily basis. And then one day my friend calls me to inform me of a sad news, the death of a mutual friend, at the other end of France. We both decide to go to the funeral, I take him to his house, I rent a hotel room (with a double bed, you never know ..) and off we go.In the car we talked about our mutual friend for a long time, then talked about things and others, sometimes trivialities. During a pee stop in the countryside, I see that he puts himself at my side for this physiological need, which suits me because I wanted to see his penis again for a few seconds. What appeals to me is that I catch his gaze on mine, a lean gaze that does not turn away, and I am happy by showing it off at best. There I notice that his is recovering slightly, but it's time to put away the equipment and get back on the road.In the evening at the hotel, after a lightly watered dinner, we get ready to go to bed, and there I lie to him, telling him that I had forgott ...

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